John (aka TMOTU) has informed us that Pet is not a good patient (yes, I’m going to milk that for all it’s worth). In the interest of helping her recovery, I thought I’d offer up a Thursday 13 on her behalf. And so, here is Pet’s Thursday Thirteen:

Thirteen Reasons Pet Should Recover Quickly

1. Twenty two million bloggers can’t be wrong. (OK, I may not have actually talked with all 22 million, but I’m sure they’d all agree she should get back soon. For those of you demanding total accuracy, the unReuterized version would read: “Two bloggers can’t be wrong.”)

2. Yaks grind confetti so far into the carpet it takes years to vaccuum out. (Unless the Bengals eat it first, in which case she’s in for a different kind of cleaning.)

3. Tigger needs more snacks than TMOTU is willing to hand out. (This message brought to you by the Feed Tigger NOW Committee.)

4. The dog is tired of washing all the dishes. (His tongue needs a rest…)

5. Painkillers are helpful in recovery - and sometimes fun - but stop taking them soon, because the things you say on them come back to haunt you. (Don’t make me tell you about the unicorn.)

6. We’ve almost finished nailing all the furniture to the ceiling, someone flushed a fuzzy cat-toy down the toilet and there’s a pizza-turned-science experiment in the kitchen that no one else is willing to touch. (In other words…someone better get in here and clean up the mess I’ve made.)

7. My roses aren’t blooming, so I can’t put up photos to keep the troops entertained. (Also, no one has bought me the new digital camera I asked for.)

8. Tigger definitely needs more snacks. He’s lying alone, pathetically limp and half-starved, in the middle of the floor. (This message brought to you by the Feed Tigger NOW and WHERE is my Mother Committee.)

9. The animals need equal time in the bed. (Before, you had your hours and they had their hours. Now you’re using THEIR hours as well as your own.)

10. The 100 Bloggers don’t want to get sued for false advertising. (100 -1….)

11. Yaks bore easily, and lately there’s been no new content on this blog. (I keep clicking my favorites link and coming over, but somehow, everything looks surprisingly familiar…)

12. In case I forgot to mention, Tigger needs snacks. The tasty ones. Now. This is really getting quite out of hand and it passed unacceptable some time ago. Someone’s going to get bitten when they get home. (This message brought to you by the I’ve Had it With This Lack of Snacks and I’m Not Going to Take it Anymore Committee.)

13. Her friends, fans and loved ones are waiting to hear her say she’s okay, and it’s not polite to keep your fans waiting. (Friends and loved ones should just get used to it.)

Linked to the Thursday Thirteen at Bloggin’ Outloud and Dane Bramage

Trackback URI | Comments RSS